The morning light breaks just beyond the Horizon, Fajr has passed and another fast takes hold. Not quite understanding my life is an understatement, floating with the current (not unhappily), with a little steer here and there to avoid major pitfalls, life has carried me into my mid twenties and quite rapidly I might add. There is a sense of amusing bewilderment that I am where I am. Not so long ago I was so far from here reading about Gen13, X-Men, the HULK…
Distinctly individual I used to think; but now dressed in a shirt, tie, shoes and of course brushed hair, I cant help but wonder how the hell did ordinary happen to me?!?! Here I find myself, “the consultant” mild mannered, bright, amicable and all those words that describe the in-between-er, the regular, everyday average.
Yet there is a raging inferno inside me screaming to break free, to run in the wild, beyond traffic jams, smoky rooms, beyond luxurious restaurants, money figures, traffic lights and taxis. To yell in open fields, swim in the ocean and breath some fresh f**king air! Some say this is the jungle it is not my jungle, it feels more like a prison. High rise, with no sun rise. I have a Hulk in me and its shouting to break out, yearning to tear off the tie and double cuff blue shirt of this mild mannered consultant.
Hulk is in us all, it is that fight against the matrix, against normality.
I was always under the impression that dreams becoming reality is hard to come by, never thought dreams themselves are hard to find. Now I dream of having a dream to follow. To give me some reason not to be ordinary.
I write these last words as I (the consultant) prepares to take the stage and present yet another mild mannered workshop.
If a chameleon keeps changing colour do u think it will eventually loose its own colour? Or do you just let it be?
Monday, September 15, 2008
Friday, August 10, 2007
I see trouble on the way....looks like we in for nasty weather...dont come around tonight, its bound to take your life, theres a bad moon on the rise
the universe is a complicated thing. The human body is a complicated thing. Life is a complicated thing. Love is a complicated thing. The only thing thats not complicated is the fact that I'm confussed. The first time I read The Hitchikers guide to the Universe I didnt get it, and there is a reason for that. There is nothing to get. Its more like life than I realized at the time. Life is an ever evolving enigma. The more you wonder about it there more you have too...Have a good weekend and if it all falls down and life royally fucks you up...just remember enjoy today...tommorrow may be worse!
And if your unhappy feeling a little depressed. just remember there are millions of starving suffering people in the world that would swap their life with you in split of a heart beat. so best not go out tonight.
Wondered by Moe at Friday, August 10, 2007
Sunday, July 15, 2007
The injustice of our time…My name is Moe
I came back for the fourth time from the American embassy, it usually takes a week for your visa to be approved, and it has now been 5 months for me. 3 visits, R1000, 2 passports, booked and cancelled 3 amazing courses later and still nothing.
They say it is because my name is too common. My reply, “John is a really common name too”. “But Sir, Moe is on a lot of terrorist lists”, she replied. “Who’s terrorists list?” I asked. “The American ones, naturally sir”, was her response.
Not too long ago, they filtered people according to the colour of their skin. Movies were made, Laws were implemented, and Countries were run on this intolerance and injustice. Then we turned to the Evil Germans who wanted to concur the world, Movies were made, Laws implemented; then the Evil Russians with their Communism that wanted to enslave the world, again Movies were made, Wars were justified and Laws implemented, then the Vietnamese, and the same; then the Chinese and the same; and then next and next, One intolerance after another…. and now its Muslims. I’m being persecuted because of my name. My name speaks of my value system, my belief, my culture, my heritage, my life. They are persecuting my life.
Honestly I’m torn between understanding the need to protect your country vs.. the outrageous miss use of power. I am a human like you, I believe in God like you, I believe that all people are equal, I believe in Peace, I believe in not hurting innocent lives (unlike you).
What if I was an Atheist, would it make a difference? Likewise what if my name is John and I’m Muslim, would I undergo the same treatment? I don’t think so, because you only see a name and assume what it represents. You assume and judge. Should we not do the same for you? Don’t tell me of 9/11, because it begs the Question what of Iraq, Vietnam, Hiroshima, Guantanamo Bay, Africa, and countless other brutalities where you killed and tortured innocent people. But in this world where you are king there is no comparison, for 9/11 justifies everything.
You filter me by my name, prejudice me because of my belief, but you do not understand me or my belief. The only mark you have left on this Earth is your ability to hate other humans different from you.
We will not change because you do not accept us. We will not be assimilated. We don’t want to visit the land where you destroyed the indigenous people. We don’t want your money, your clothes, your view on beauty and your “all things american”. However the nature of this period in the World sometimes forces us to visit you and then I must try to be like you, and I must feel that prejudice and I must wait 5 months at my expense for your acceptance. And if you grant us that visa accepting us to visit your land of abundance and waste we go there knowing, you are judging us, watching us, never understanding us, never willing to tolerate something different from you.
I am a Muslim, My name is Moe
Wondered by Moe at Sunday, July 15, 2007
Friday, March 23, 2007
On my way home from work the normal route, Clock reads 11pm. i look around me, the buildings on the side of the highway, They look so foreign to me now.
I almost don't know what I'm doing here on this planet. Enjoy my life? now I cant remember why i do what i do. What the hell am I working so hard for? Why is making money so important? Why is gyming so damn critical?
I'm sick of it, being alive and always having to do what I must.
Winter Blues I skiem :-) O and poor old Bob. That is terrible news, when you hear stuff like that you wonder if all the sport we watch is just like WWE staged with the outcome planned!
My friend has fallen in love, he does not admit it as in his mind he is taking things easy. Guys like him, I give him 2 months before wedding bells are ringing. Strange thing love though. The butterflies are amazing but really so unrelated to reality that you could almost fall in love with anything! Its strange like that cause its almost like you in love with the concept of the person instead of what the person has to offer you.
Then again maybe its destined, written in the script of the universe, and that's the reason for the butterfly's. People change how do you guarantee the love doesn't? Namaaz time will update later
Wondered by Moe at Friday, March 23, 2007
Monday, February 26, 2007
(warning: 13L - this post contains a few swear words and symbols like *%# just don't do justice)
Sitting in the kitchen on a soft cushion stool, bare feet on the biting cold tiles… Soft pattering of drizzle on the steel roof, slow monotonous tick…to-ck of the clock. Home alone, computer screen fills my eyes with rows and columns of figures…yet another spreadsheet. Work almost done I squint my eyes. All I can think of is …what a fucked up week…Lord have mercy on my soul.
On Monday last week, I looked forward to a relaxing week, my list of priorities included preparing for the proposal (going to be kick ass), preparing for my trip oversees, doing my tax return, finding a new car, maybe doing some side coding, surfing net etc…
Fate, Taqdeer, Karma and the messed up side of mother fucking nature got me very quickly, God forbid I may actually have a good week. In summary my trip got cancelled, the proposal was delayed (no flowers), was involved in car pile up (I was driving my dads car it is now undrivable- Not my fault), new project in Namibia wants me to start next week (like being a year out of country wasn’t enough), my Career councillor thinks I’m too ambitious, my gal thinks I’m too indecisive, my parents moved to jozi and now we staying together again after 7 years on my own (lack of freedom but food is good), I meant to invest in company, I forgot and lost 20% of returns on the day AAARRGGHH!, I also found out my buddy’s new born baby past away, just when I phoned to congratulate him about it. My opening line was Hey ure a daddy now!
My week ended with a Friday in traffic and the worst possible songs on the radio cause I lost the remote to my shuttle and now can’t change the cd.
Plan for this week: Roll with punches and keep my head up. If you want details y not come live this fucked up time in my life!
….Just one chance, just one breath, just in case… there’s just one left…(nickleback Far away)
Times of this desperation i read two poems, Rudyard Kipling - IF and the other my gals fav Desiderata
Enjoy and keep the peace.
Wondered by Moe at Monday, February 26, 2007
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Hi guys while i don't have much of a fan base or any for that matter.
For the interested and to kill procrastination, I will be updating my blog next week.
It has been a hectic start of the year but things are easing up and I'm back in SA from 16th of Feb. So w8 4it :-)
over and out....o before i go quick joke:
2 way radio conversation transcript from South African Defense force:
Bravo Een kom in, Bravo een kom in
Bravo Een asseblief kom in, Bravo Een kom in!
1 second pause
Bravo Een is jy daar?
2 second pause
Reply from Rooi Volf: Vok man jy is Bravo Een!
hehe :-) weak i know but u must have chuckled at least.
Wondered by Moe at Thursday, February 15, 2007
Friday, October 20, 2006
Just bored figured I'd upload and image. Wondering.
Normal state of mind. Ramdaan has been good tough as it should be. Towards these last few dwindling hours I take a bit of strain and things catch up to you. 12 tasks undone one of them which I've just been pushing out for the last week.
Watsup up with that hey? Proscrastination.
Wondered by Moe at Friday, October 20, 2006